How much can you expect from someone ...how much can you hope they'd be there and watch your back ..how much can u expect them not to take advantage of you ...how much is it okay to get involved just how much ? ( yeah this is going to be a whiny post ..deal with it *pouts* )
Being 3 was so much easier right? No problems , no fights no issues , no expectations , no hurt ....fights lasted one night and next day it was like nothing ever happend ..the most hurtful thing you ever said to anyone would be "i hate you" without even meaning it ...the most u cried was over a hurting toe ..the most you missed someone was your mom when she went shopping .." love " was easily used and forgiveness easily granted ..so why can't we be that anymore ! What exactly comes in the way? ego ? pride ? jealousy ? insecurity ? I dont know ..i'm still learning ..i find it hard to forget so i say it ..i hurt easy so i say it ..i expect so i say it ...and i don't want to apologize for who i am and how i feel ..no one should ...one expects only from those you love and thats not exactly a bad thing ..you hurt only because someone has the power to hurt you and thats not a bad thing either ( no i'm not saying it should end your world ..bt it happens and its normal )
So many questions in my head right now . When exactly should you give up on someone and just not try to mend what you'll have ..it could be a broken friendship ...a bad relationship ..anything but how long do you wait hoping things will get better ! Someone was so special at one time so you just let them go by saying " maybe i dont deserve it " to yourself or you do everything you can till it works out ...but shouldn't it be both ways ..what if something was special only to you..does it count then ?
It feels terrible and you feel too weak to make a call and besides i have never believed in the saying " If two people are meant to be they'll find a way" ..i always read it as " If two people want to be together they make a way to make it happen " :) yes i'm the pushy types and i don't give up .