Monday, 30 January 2012

I'm Disgusted.

You know how some things make you feel so helpless and insignificant that you want to scream at the nearest living being around and say " WHAT THE HELL . "
 Five years ago in August 2007 a 16 year old boy left the house to meet his friends. He was discovered dead in the bushes of Navi Mumbai. He had been strangled .His father's car was found on the Palm Beach Road , Vashi.
   I was 15 then , watching tv and flipping through channels when I saw this news. I don't exaggerate when I say this , but I remember every little detail of that day. I thought to myself it could so easily be me or someone I know , or someone I'm close to. The alleged killers - five in all were the boy's friends from a gaming parlour. They kept in touch through a social networking site. The group of them , according to the police needed quick money. Some had debts they needed to settle. Adnan , that was his name , seemed like a gullible target. Rich businessman  dad , with a good set-up in Andheri. Adnan left the house with his father's car and the next morning his father recieved a call for a 2 crore ransom . Adnan was knocked unconcious by spiking his drink. Meanwhile the news of the kidnapping had broken on the news channels. So the abductors strangled him , dumped his body and took local trains home.
    Key evidence in the case being the messages exchanged between Adnan and the alleged kidnappers on the social networking site, one of them told the police where Adnan's blood stained clothes were hidden. There was a witness who had seen Adnan being thrust into the car in an unconcious condition. The police had relied on circumstantial evidence.
 Now five years later the court acquits the 5 "alleged" killers because of lack of concrete evidence. The witness changes its stand and the accused are left without a single allegation on them . This is India and this how the law works here. You kill someone and get away just like that because the burden of proof always lies on the victim . It took 5 years for them to firstly come to a conclusion and when they did , this is their answer. The evidence is not good enough and the acquitted have the audacity to say that the truth has won , that they lost a friend and then were accused of killing him .
     You know what's not good enough , a 16 year old boy being killed is not good enough. The press being a bunch of cowards and not standing up for this is not good enough. This instilled a fear in me five years ago , fear of making friends online , fear of trusting anybody, fear that 16 year old people get killed for money. This is not good enough. I do not understand how people are okay with this . Why is there no outrage for such cases , why can't we fight for these things like we fight corruption . I want a Jessica Lal case type march for Adnan Patrawala's justice . I have no personal connection with him , I don't know the guy  but everytime I see that innocent face on the news it kills me a little inside. If the alleged are innocent , why did it take five years to decide that .
  What disgusts me most is how the trending topic of Twitter is Shahrukh Khan slapping Shirish Kunder. How stupid are we becoming , why are people not talking about this , why are we not fighting for justice. I don't know what this blog post is going to achieve, but if my posting this is going to make even my 46 followers , share their outrage about this verdict I feel its worth it. I want the press to do the something , use its power and just not hold baseless discussions . Let's not have a " Not in my backyard" attitude. This happened in my city but it could happen in yours . Hundreds of cases just lie there with no conclusion . It has to stop somewhere. The value of a life has to be understood . I want to grow up in a country where justice is served and no one gets away with something as grave as murder.

  I'm hoping for better days , I'm hoping for a little awakening .

Woah ! Dream Big ;)

 ( This is one of the many ranting drafts I have not published . Don't read it . You have been warned . )

Why ..why..why are you still reading ? Fine be that way, but leave the judgmental mind behind.

I am such a fickle minded person . Put choices in front of me and watch me look at you stupidly as if I was asked about something on quantum physics. I just can't pick . My life choices have been a series of choice by elimination decisions , the 'not this theory' in my words.
      So yes , where were we ? I took Commerce simply because Science didn't seem like my thing due to the incapacity to understand physics and also heart wrenching reactions towards blood and human gums or organs etc .Arts was more like a hobby didn't know if I wanted to make a career out of anything that they had on their curriculum. I secretly wish I had taken Arts though ..but the 15 year old me was really stupid .  I wanted to go to a particular college just because I wanted to . No reason . Just ( Yeah I'm wierd like that ) It was an obsession to get admission there and they offered only Commerce and this dear people is choice by elimination.
  You may wonder where this is going to take me ? To a lot of money apparently , studying CA aren't I . Yeah big bucks there my friend , big bucks. It doesn't interest me though and I don't really care about the money. No , I'm not a saint but money is and will always be secondary. I want to explore , do what I love . But before that I need to find what I truly love to be able to do it for a relatively long time. I have no clue why , after I passed the inter exam my first reaction was damn , I'm stuck. I struck a deal with my Mom that I'll give it my best but if I don't clear it would be it for me , I'm knocking some other door. But no life has its mysterious and annoying ways to piss me off. There are thousands , literally thousands wanting to be where I am ( I don't get why . ) but here I am wasting a seat and I realize that but I genuinely don't know what to do.
  The articleship period is really dull . Please don't say find your calling , do what interests you , do what you like best . If you think I haven't thought about it ofcourse I have . My calling lost my number and I lost my calling's number too ( new phone and all that .. sorry lame ) . Just what is calling anyway. I want work to be fun , and work will stop being fun once it becomes a routine. So even if I have a job where I party everyday , one day I'll be sick and won't want to party . Right ? Apparently it seems no one likes their job . I met someone through a mutual friend , she does event management and marketing for movies through social media , can you believe it . Her job profile is to use social networking sites to promote the said events and movies . Getting paid to while away time on facebook :\ and attending free parties with an open bar and free food . She doesn't like it , like all the socializing is apparently too tiring . Hello ? I'd love to spend all my life meeting new people at parties :O ! I'm a people person that way. I envy people who know what they want to do and are already working towards getting there . I have a friend whose doing Hotel Management and he actually loves it. Cooking , folding sheets , waiting tables and cleaning washrooms , I don't get it but who am I to judge. We tease him a lot but inside I really respect his choice and I'm sure he's going to do some amazing things with his life , because he loves what he does. I want to do so many things.

My I want to list -
  • I want to study Law
  • I want to get a PhD in Literature 
  • I want to learn about early history
  • I want to study criminal psychology
  • I want to know about the Orion Galaxy
  • I want to study evolution 
  • I want to do mass communication
  • I want to write a book :O :P
  • I want to do a full time MBA outside Mumbai
  • I want to dissect a frog ( not really )
  • I want to do none of the above and go on never ending trip ( yeah right who doesn't ?) 
But you know you get the drift . How am I going to do ALL this ? Don't know . 
My aptitude test revealed I should be a architect , A CA , an interior decorator , DJ ( yes DJ ) and I should also try my hands on gardening and 100 other things .:| So don't blame me for not putting my faith into 1500 MCQs about my interest and sorts. I feel a little direction less , not ambition less directionless. 
     I have big dreams , so big that sometimes it scares me . I'm taking it one day at a time , while giving my 100 % in the moment . Let's say I'll keep this space updated with where this mess takes me ;) To all those who do know , what they want to do with their life . Go ahead and do it . Live it up. Cause one day you don't want to blame someone else for how your life turned out , trust me . :)

PS : I updated my Photography page . Its barely a 'Photography' page , more like a bunch of my random clicks :) You can see it here. Let me know what you think 
PPS: This is my 50th post :) *little joys*

Saturday, 28 January 2012

The tale of 3 meetings :)

She was in a rush . Today was going to be a busy day. Sundays are supposed to be for rest, aren't they ?
She made her way to the book exhibition . Some friends were going to join her later. Books gave her a high , reading was more than just a hobby.
  This book exhibition was not like others though , it was for charity . She was going to buy donated books , the proceeds of which would be used for educating street kids. She was always up for a cause , any cause . A complete fighter. She reached her favorite eatery , where the sale was held.
   As she was making her way up the stairs of the beautiful five storeyed building of the restaurant. She found a friendly face on her way and asked about where the book sale was being held. He just stared at her . She waited for his answer with an amused expression. She asked again , this time slowly.
" I'm sorry , its just that you have beautiful eyes. Its over there , at the end of the corridor . " he finally said with a sheepish smile .
She was a little taken aback and also a little creeped by this complete stranger complimenting her eyes.
" Thanks" she mouthed and walked away but as she did so she smiled , the most genuine smile in days . A smile that reached her eyes , because a stranger had complimented her and she knew he meant it .

There is a reason to smile , even on the worst of days .

Today Priya was meeting an old friend. There was an age gap between them , almost a 12 year gap. Friendship they say doesn't see age. Her friend was married and had two beautiful daughters. Priya tried to remember the last time they met , it was around 2 years ago , it was Ananya's younger daughter's naming ceremony . Ananya and Rahul were the perfect couple . Madly in love . They had eloped and married each other at the age of 22 , against their parents' wishes. Young love , Priya thought . Ananya and Rahul were the reason for a lot of people's envy.
   As Priya entered the coffee shop , she spotted Ananya smiling at her. Something was missing from the smile though , her face it looked a little wrinkled. It was probably age. They chatted about what had been up in Priya's life . Priya had always been the talker. She had so much to tell Ananya. Once she was done , she shot questions at Ananya , asking about Sia and Aria.
" They are fine , Sia is all kicked about school. Aria has started talking , and she just doesn't stop." said Ananya with that motherly smile.
" How's Rahul , its been so long since I met him. " enquired Priya.
" I thought you may have heard " said Ananya .
" Heard what? " Priya was now tensed.
 " Rahul left me . He cheated on me. He's been having an affair with his widowed senior at work . He lives with her now ."
" What ? I'm sorry I really didn't know . What about the kids ? " Priya was now choking on her words , they had been married ten years , ten long years . How could he just leave.
" Well he doesn't want to have anything to do with the kids , I can't even file for a divorce. The house is in his name , I don't have a job and the kids are too young right now for me to work full time. There is a big loan on the house. I asked him to stay , for the kids if not for me. I told him he could have an affair but just support us , but he didn't , he just... " Ananya couldn't say anything else , tears were falling from her eyes now . She looked away.
Priya held her hand and said " Please let me know if I can help you in anyway possible ."
" Get him back , can you ? " she said . She didn't want his money , his family , his house all she wanted was him . She still loved him and probably always would.

Accept that the best of things fall apart , all we can do is pick ourselves up and move on while making a little space for better things to happen. 

Isha was coming to Mumbai after three years. Isha's dad was in the civil services , they moved alot. Three years back they had moved to Delhi . This move had been a little difficult for her than the rest.
    She was coming back today , her dad was transferred to Mumbai again. Of all the places , she had been to she loved Mumbai the best . She was born here. As she entered her house , the same house which she had left some years back , memories flooded in of all the times she had spent here. Just as she was lost in her thoughts, the door bell rang . It was Saloni , her bestfriend. They had kept in touch for all these years , they were in the same school back then and couldn't do without each other .
" Ishaaaa !! I' m so happy to see you , you are finally back. Let's go down everyone is waiting for you. We missed you so much " Saloni finished excitedly.
Isha met all her friends and they talked about all times they had when she was here and all that happened while she wasn't . But as they spoke she looked around for that familiar face. She had assumed he wouldn't be here anyway. It was finally dinner time and Isha's mom called out to her to come up again. She was about to leave , when  someone called her .
 " Hey ! Got a minute ? "
Isha's heart skipped a beat , she was staring into the same blue eyes she knew so well. The boy with the crooked smile, and messy hair looked at her intently , she knew the look.
"Hey Rohan ! Long time eh ? " she tried to be casual.
" I'm sorry Isha , I really am . I know it might be too late for that but I really didn't mean to hurt you. I haven't been with anyone since you left , and I missed you. " Rohan said so fast , like he had rehearsed it over and over . He had.
Isha just looked at him , not knowing what to say. " I missed you too , but don't say you didn't mean to. You cheated on me, ofcourse you meant to. "
"I'm sorry . " said Rohan while he stared at his feet.
" Lets be friends like before everything ." Isha said with a smile
" Yeah, thanks. " Rohan said , still avoiding eye contact.

Forgiveness is not something we do for other people . We do it for ourselves to get well soon and move on.

I know this picture has nothing to do with the post , but its beautiful :)  
(Courtesy : Nagi Marie Quirk's photostream)
Ps : This is not fiction , only the names are changed :)

Wednesday, 25 January 2012

Letter To Me :)

I always wanted to write a letter to myself . You know the typical reflective letters , about everything life has taught you or everything you want to happen in your life . Well letter to my older self or younger self is the question . I'm not that mentally developed to write a letter to my older self  besides I don't know what life will hold for me even tomorrow so I think writing a letter to future me is a little pointless right now. So to the 6 year old me I write you this letter for you to know what to expect in the next 14 years .
( Disclaimer : Freakishly long post ahead :) )

Dear 6 year old me ,
               Hello , sweetheart . I know you are the disillusioned happy child right now , with not a worry in the world . Don't lose that innocence . I know you won't . Be trusting always , even after you get hurt again and again, trust someone new with all your heart. Others will tell you otherwise , they will say don't be so open , don't be so vulnerable . Don't listen , do your own thing.
              Your years are going to be very happy , trust me . Do your homework. Sleep well and eat healthy . Take that occasional sport up , which you will give up after a few months , the distracted child that you are . Do it anyway , just for fun . Music is going to fill your life up very soon. All types of music , old and new . Let it . Music is going to be your buffer. Make a lot of friends and watch F.r.i.e.n.d.s with them . It doesn't seem like you will right now . You're a selfish brat aren't you , but you will . Some amazing people await you in the years to come . Respect friendship always , its the glue that holds life together , you are nothing without them .
              Learn to laugh at yourself , don't be stuck up . Take a joke , when you should and give it right back when it crosses a line . You're going to be hitting puberty ( Ask Mom what puberty is , go freak her :P ) , face it and accept the changes that take place, physically and otherwise. Your body will change and so will your temperament , the pain may get bad sometimes but its making you stronger. If boys make fun of you when you say you have your periods ask them to try and bleed for 5 days without cribbing .
              You hate change , don't you . From getting the same type of bicycle twice to buying the same clothes in 3 sizes you've done it all to avoid it . Its okay , someday you will learn to embrace change like an old friend and finally even enjoy it . We all hate change , what we actually want is for things to remain the same yet get better. They will get better , eventually . Believe in happy endings and fairies and Santa for as long as you can . Don't be practical  , be stupid sometimes . Don't be ignorant , be informed .
             Read a lot , you will I know. Reading takes you to places you never thought you could go to. Make that library dream come true. I know you are into Noddy right now , but really that is not the best book ever , I know you disagree ( strongly ). Control that temper , calm down a little bit . Curtail or control that hyperactive energy in you , it worries people . I know you want a sibling real bad, asking the doctors in various hospitals if you could take just one baby home is not a nice thing to do. Being the only child is not such a bad thing , develop bonds with your cousins. Be grateful for each and everyday. Love Mom and Dad they are all you've got . Don't be so unreasonable sometimes , understand that they are doing their best to give you the best of everything. Also know they hide most of the problems from you , so that you don't worry , be thankful for that. Enjoy school , you're going to miss it way to much once its over.
           Respect your teachers , they make you what you are . Ask your doubts , no question is ever stupid. Boys will come into your life one day without you even realizing , its just the hormones , relax. A lot of times it will feel like its love but it never is and when love finally does come , you'll just know . Love will hurt sometimes but don't give up always give it one more chance. Find the person who feels you are beautiful inside , cause exterior beauty fades . Its okay to cry in movies like Toy Story 3 . Don't carry baggage in the future. Be kind and helpful. Understand that the world is not all butterflies and ponies , people face a lot of challenges on a daily basis , empathize . Be compassionate and equally passionate . You'll know the difference one day. Dream , and I can't stress it enough NEVER STOP DREAMING . Don't ever assume , something will not happen for you.   It always does , if you want it badly enough. You have a gift , its only going to take some time for you to know that .
          You may feel you are not really enjoying what you are doing , or that life is a little directionless. Don't be scared. Keep at it ,  it will go well. Enjoy the arts . You are going to love drama and the stage and the grandness of it all , let it amaze you. Look at the world with those excited eyes and absorb it all . Note down the random midnight thoughts , they are the best ideas you have. Give everything your best shot always your best and nothing less. Give the relationships and people more importance in your life, give up the pride and ego. The pride will kill your talent and ego will kill the relationship. Its okay to be sad , its okay to feel bad and its okay to cry sometimes , you don't have to pretend to be strong all the time and when you find the guy you can cry in front of , don't let him go.
         Don't wear heels , you'll end up with shoes bites , always. You are tall enough anyway. Dress to be comfortable and not to impress. Be the person who's always distinct in a crowd , not the crowd pleaser. Be genuine. Don't be cruel to animals. Don't be someone who can't stand up for herself , fight your own battles. You will be tempted to experiment and tempted to give in , but you are strong and responsible. Don't do anything you didn't actually want to do. People will try and put restrictions or say things like " Because you are a girl " , ignore that . If something is bad , its equally bad for everybody and not you alone . People will leave , sometimes willingly , and sometimes without wanting to . Its a loss anyway. Mourn it but eventually let it go , not them , the loss . You know you cringe at the word death , even I do sometimes . Let's not talk about it . ( typical. ) . Be open to any kind of knowledge and be ready to adapt. Also people will argue with what you feel , don't get defensive have an open mind. Lastly have a big heart and never let love leave it .

Me :)

Drama Hai Rama !!!

Would it be wrong to say I miss you ?
I miss how you woke me up everyday , you always had so much to say.
I miss the way you called out , to draw my attention .
I miss the way your face would light up every time I looked at you.
I miss all your expressions of love , anger and fun.
I miss the way you shined even under the sun.
I miss the way you brought music to my ears.
I miss how my friends were your friends too and how you kept us together.
I miss how well you dressed .
I miss the noises you made when I pushed your buttons
I miss how you could make the perfect small talk
I miss how you never broke even after I physically assaulted you.
I miss how proud I was to have you.
I miss you my Blackberry :'(

Don't laugh at me okay. I get attached to my gadgets :( I'm having withdrawal symptoms . I miss my blackberry , Android phones have its set of pros but then my Blackberry was like my baby .

But you know what my new phone did to me . :D It got Radio back in my life .The soulful hindi music that felt so distant is back . I truly missed the FM radio when I had a BB . ( Yeah , I'm always wanting the other side of the grass :p ) .

I am a typical 90's kid and FM Radio was a very important part of my life in my childhood years, I always felt it was like someone was talking to me all the time . The radio was like a person :D This could be due to the single child syndrome :P but still , I felt pure joy when I heard those old songs playing :) Hindi music had a soul back then , lyrics meant much more than just noise and rubbish playing to some tune. I agree there are a few good songs even now , but nothing beats the 80's and 90's in the music they brought for us .
  The happiness one feels when you listen to them  is magnified when you hear it on the radio , trust me on that . The radio jockey may add a little anecdote attached with the song or some fact about the singer , or just share a personal experience and there you are taken back in time , with a big smile on your face.
  Lage Raho Munnabhai changed the image of radio jockeys in the mindset of Indians . Let me tell you they are really cool people , to be able to connect with someone just through their voice is something that takes a lot of talent . After the movie radio was patronized by more than just cabbies and watchmen . If you said you wanted to be a radio jockey people no more stared at you , instead they said " Gooood morning Mumbai , that's what you want to do ? " . :P
 I actually have my favorite radio jockeys too :D  I'm a total sucker for someone with a good voice , I may not like you or your face but if you have that magical voice , I'll just melt *dreamy* You may argue that there is less music and more jabber jabber on the radio , but I kinda like the jabber jabber too , especially the Mumbai channels are brilliant cause it connects me to the Mumbai spirit in a little way. It brings back old memories with the beautiful songs , songs which were born before me but still resonate in the ears of millions . The radio jockeys also try and give you traffic updates and  daily Mumbaiya gossip , they are cool that way . I don't have a favorite channel as such , wherever I hear a beautiful voice , I'm hooked .

If you have never heard the radio ( not in the car for like 5 mins , i mean like properly heard it along with the jabber jabber ) , you should go kill yourself . If you aren't as homicidal , you should just start listening to it now and feel the awesomeness it is :D

PS : Never . I repeat . Never try to find out what a radio jockey looks like , NEVER . It will be so disappointing and heart breaking , that you will have trust issues for the rest of your life and won't be able to look at yourself in the mirror for days . Their faces never match their voice . *sigh*

Monday, 23 January 2012

Cleaning my closet .

If the title reminded you of the EMINEM song *hi5* but  no my post has nothing to do with it whatsoever . :P I'm vague like that >_<
Today I happened to clean out my closet where I keep old diaries ,  scrap books and old gifts etc etc , I found a spectacular blue colored book with my adolescent poems in them :O
Yeah apparently I wrote love poems when I was 12-15 ( Yeah I'm trying to act all cool now , but I know exactly who it was for also :P )

But the point is that as cheesy as they are and as stupid as I feel after reading them , it wasn't all that bad for a 13-14 year old :D So have a good laugh ( or not )


My knees start to shake 
When you are in sight 
My mind is filled with wonder 
My heart with fright

When will the feeling stop ?

When did it start?
How can I listen to my mind 

Without breaking my heart

I'm so confused 
What should I do ?
I can't think of anything 
Apart from you.

Should I ignore you 
Or just give it time 
I can't think straight 
My heart controls my mind

Bottled up inside 
Are the things I never said 
The feelings that I hide 
The lines you never read.

You can see it in my eyes
Read it on my face
Trapped behind the lies
Is that I'm confused inside 

With memories that linger 
& just don't fade away
Why can't I be happier 
Today is a brand new day

It surprises me as to how
You mean so much to me
You bring a smile on my face
In every moment free

If you could just see
That we were meant to be
It may seem like nothing to you

But you are everything to me

- BluBluBling  

Yes this is written by me , yes I can rhyme :) , I choose not to cause then ^ this happens :P Not bad huh ?
I want to be in this kind of innocent love again =) . The absolutely trusting , silly and hurtless love . No promises and no mind games O:)

Ps: This was the least cheesiest so you can imagine the rest . Do not ask me to share them please .

This picture is clicked by Aakanksha Pathak , the first time I saw it I thought about young love , hence its here =) You can see more of her pictures here

Friendship is all about relativity !

I'm going to give out some Gyaan today. I have recently come to realize that friendship is all about relativity . You can also say its based on preferential relativity . We all know people need people and we all need to have people around us to bare and actually understand our idiosyncratic nonsense . So how do we pick these people that will come to bare our nonsense is the topic of discussion.
  No , its not mutual likes and same opinions , no its not based on any hormonal imbalances in our system ( ok maybe a little that ) , no its not same environment and no its definitely not destiny my amigos , Its Wait for it ..RELATIVITY. In relation to the other people around and the large amount of lameness they possess you pick the person with the least lameness and then find mutual likes , interests , hormonal tendencies etc and call it friendship . True Story . 

   I have a theory . Out of every 100 people I meet . I instantly like 20 , out of them I continue to like 5 even after 2 hours. Out of those 5 I think 3 are not lame and are interesting , hold my attention , don't bore me , are funny and I can have a good time with . So if I take the sample of my Facebook friendlist which is loosely a list of all the interactions and people I could refer to as "friends"  and contains 597 people I can safely say I have 17 people that I like enough to continue remaining friends with and I trust , get along with , and find more than just tolerable.
    Now out of these 17 people 1 moved to Canada when I was 12 , 2 - I have completely lost touch with , 5 are not that close and 2 are studying in London . So I can safely say I have 7 awesome people in my life ..who I love and are there for me always and in all probability will be there forever since replacing any of them would be a next to impossible and not to mention TEDIOUS process. Additions to same are welcome but my screening process says a lot about my pickyness and condescending attitude :P So when that special retard comes along who actually fits with you like a jigsaw puzzle , someone you can discuss anything and everything with , don't let that one go :D

PS : Its really hard to be friends with me :P but there are a still a few amazing people who manage to do it #LikeABoss ;)

Friday, 20 January 2012

My cute friend !

This may not seem funny to my readers but I know this guy so well and that's why I know exactly the sentiment and stupidity he must have written this with and hence it's hilarious :P . His poems are gems , really and his diary is worth publishing  *sense the sarcasm* ! Enjoy :P


The morning is bright,
I'm in mood for some sprite.

Wait, my teeth need to be brushed,
The commode needs to be flushed.

Im late for my school,
Morning school is so uncool.

I load my self with some cash
And out of the door I dash.

I enter into the lift,
Go down swift swift.

THEN it strikes me today,
I have a fucking holiday!

Today is not project submission,
It's Ganpati Bappa's emersion!

I re-enter the lift,
Go Up swift swift.

I remove my sad school dress,
Get into my cozy night dress.

I know the morning is bright
But who cares, for me its Good Night !

  By Abhishek Bijlani  
  Age : 14 years
  Based on a true story :P

Ps: He isn't 14 now and has turned from cute to plain annoying :P You can also know more about him from this website he made when he was 13 :P 

Wednesday, 18 January 2012

Some Story - Part 3

This is continued from Some Story - Part 2  !

Arush reached Jogger's Park at 4.30 . One and half hour before the decided time . It didn't seem like a stupid idea when he left home , but when he had to sit and stare at couples making out on the rocks it didn't seem like a smart decision
   Meanwhile ..Poo was stuffing clothes in a large bag , the types you take with you on a hiking trip . Her mom was yelling from the other room . She was saying something about her wedding .
 " Poo now that you are engaged ..blah blah...your in laws blah blah..Krish is a very nice guy..blah blah blah "
Poo was now leaving the house to meet Arush . She had a naughty grin on her face.
" Where are you off to ? Krish is taking you for dinner right ? " her mom asked.
" Well yeah , but i thought now that I'll be moving to Delhi I won't need a few clothes , I'm just going to drop them off at that NGO in bandra . I'll be back in an hour . " Poo was grinning stupidly . The way she always did when she lied .
 " Ah okay okay " her mom distractedly replied. She was now on a call with her friend boasting about her IIM graduate , future son - in - law.
   On her way to Jogger's Park Poo was thinking of all the times she had lied just like today and met Arush. All the times he stood outside her window at night just so he could see her while they spoke in hushed voices over the phone. All the times they got into a mock fight , they were really fought . Most people found it strange how they had never really had a fight . They always said we are just so happy around each other there is no reason to fight .
  A sudden pang of guilt hit her. She thought about Krish. He had been so nice to her . Krish was a handsome man , honest and caring . Since the engagement had been fixed, he called her everyday and asked about her day and told her about his . He wanted to connect with her before they actually got married , which she thought was sweet . He had taken her out a couple of times to get to know her better . He had no bad habits , atleast thats what he claimed . Never smoked , never had alcohol , doesn't know anything about drugs and is probably the only guy over 25 who is still a virgin.  He seemed like a nice guy , the boring types but nice. Her in-laws were the most Punjabi-ish Punjabi family she had met . They fit the typecast so perfectly.
 Her thoughts were interrupted by the rickshaw wala's puzzled voice telling her to get out of his vehicle. She got down and went into the park but she couldn't find Arush . She called him but he didn't answer . She thought he was late as usual and waited for him .She had waited for almost like an hour when she called one more time . This time he answered.
"Hello Arush ?" she said angrily.
" Hello this is Inspector Sharma here the owner of this phone  has had a very bad accident and we are taking him to Holy Family Hospital , please inform his family if you can. "
Poo didn't know what to do she hung up saying she'll be there in no time and searched through her contacts to find Arush's home number . A recorded message from the other end said that this number no longer existed, she realized she hadn't dialed this number in months they probably got a new number. Without wasting another minute she hailed a rickshaw and reached Holy Family Hospital.

2 hours back...

Arush was nervously prancing in Jogger's Park deciding what he would tell her when she would actually be face to face with him . I'll tell her I'm getting married too..Ha ! Revenge or that I have landed a job in New York , she loved New York . He quickly changed his mind , he couldn't lie to her to save his life he thought , she would see right through it. He didn't want to face her , he suddenly realised .
         He'd love to see her again but he wouldn't be able to let her go this time.She belonged to someone else now. There was no chance he they could be together now , she wouldn't go against her family. He left , he was going to forget her and let her move on with her life . He still wished the best of all worlds for her.

Holy Family Hospital..

Poo frantically enquired about Arush at the hospital reception. She asked about a latest accident case. She was shown the way to a small room on the 1st floor. She entered with her heart thumping in her chest , anticipating the worst .
     She had left home today with the intention of running away with him , with the love of her life . She had given this a lot of thought , her parent's would never let go of the rich Punjabi boy Krish. They were in love with him. Arush was from a simple Gujarati family , no grand riches and no IIM degree but she loved HIM. She called him on the night of the annual day to let him know she loved him and that she needed him to stop this marriage but she couldn't . They were speaking after months , she didn't know how to tell him .
    As she flung the door open , she saw a man shorter in frame than Arush and thinner too lying on the hospital bed. It wasn't him . She had probably entered the wrong room , she thought when her eyes fell on the inspector.
  " Who is this ? " she asked.
" He hasn't gained consciousness since his arrival here . He doesn't have any money or any kind of identity proof on him " said the inspector
" There is some confusion this is not my friend . You spoke to me a while back " Poo felt a sigh of relief , if Arush wasn't here it meant he was safe.
" Well maybe he's just a thief then , we found this phone with him . " the inspector produced the phone and handed it to Poo
" Well I need to take your leave " Poo dashed outside with a big smile on her face. She was running now . She yelled at a Cab and said " Andheri chaloge "

5 years after this day 

" Tell us na Poo , then what happend ? " her cousin's said in unison.
" Well I'll let Arush tell you the rest ." Poo said giving Arush a wink .
Arush a little taken aback at the sudden burden of narration being shifted on him . " We lived happily ever after . " Arush said stupidly.
Poo's 15 year old cousins were now giving Poo the , did you really marry this guy look . Looking at them she decided to tell them the rest herself .

 Back then

Poo landed at Arush's place , bag full of clothes in hand and no money in the pocket . She hadn't met him in months but she knew he loved her.  Arush opened the door and froze.
" What are you doing here ? " he was so shocked , his face had lost its color.
" I am here to run away with you . I don't want to marry Krish . I want to marry you. " Poo was grinning now .
" Huh ? " is the only thing that came out of Arush's mouth
" Don't huh me . I called you that day to tell you I love you , but you said congratulations and hung up . I knew you'd come around though . Right munchkin ? "
" I don't like you calling me munchkin , you know that " Arush was now turning red like he always did when she called him that.
" So you're going to fuss about what I call you , when I'm asking you to marry me ? " Poo was enjoying this.
"So you want me to run away with you . Right now ? " Arush was still staring at her with disbelief
" Yes!"
" You are crazy , you know that right ? "
"Yes!" Poo smiled that irresistible smile that always melted his heart.
" Bhaag jaana koi option nahi hai , kaisa lagega bhaag gaye ..hum log runners hai ? Arush aur Poo bhaag gaye  " Arush had now started quoting her favorite movie. The one she watched over and over . It was turning into their story .

5 years later... 

"And yeah that's the story of how we ran away "  said  Poo with a happy sigh
" We lived at a friend's apartment for two months and then we were cajoled into coming back home the bollywood way which was followed by a grand inter caste wedding . " Arush added, to feel like he also contributed something .
" Wow ! " said Poo's cousins ." You'll are the perfect couple aren't you'll .? Thought of any names for the baby yet ? "
"Aria" said Arush and Poo at once . 
  PS : This story is finally over . If the typical bollywood ending took you by surprise , offended you , or simply disappointed you well too bad ..I'm a hopeless romantic , it had to have a happy ending .
PPS : For those who actually read all three parts , a very big thank you . I wish they were in line too.

Are you listening ?

I want to tell you
I want to tell you a few things .
I want to say I miss you
I want to say I have 28 followers on my blog now , you know it excites me
I want to tell you I made a new friend this year
I want to tell you I'm studying something new
I want to tell you about the book I just read and how the protagonist was so much like you.
I want to tell you I'm not well , ask me to get well soon?
I want to tell you I checked out the coffee shop where we were supposed to go but without you
I want to tell you I found the perfect turtledoves
I want to tell you about the song I play on repeat these days .
I want to tell you about the movie I think you would love.
I want to tell you I can't cry anymore , thankyou for that I guess.
I want to tell you I haven't heard your voice in two months and that is wierd.
I want to tell you I bought a new phone
I want to tell you I still wish the best of all worlds for you
I want to tell you about my happiness jar
I want to say I don't remember you much , but when I do every little thought leads to you.
I want to show you my new painting .
I want to complain to you about  how boring work is.
I want to ask you to meet me.

But I also have a few questions...

Why this time ?
Why now?
How's your little brother ?
How's your dad , did the surgery go fine?
Do you miss me?
Why were you not there when I was so ill and I couldn't move?
Why didn't you call.?
Are you going to come back ? Please don't .
What did you do for new years?
New year resolutions ? I'm sure you have some .
I don't think you're listening . I don't think I can reach you anymore. 

(This is fiction. No arguments. Or maybe not :P )

               Too many drafts piling up . I have so much to write about and so much I've written but not posting . All that comes out is ummmmm :S
                         Also this is pending :(  Some Story - Part 3 ??  I'm not very well acquainted with foresight haven't thought of an ending yet or rather have thought of way too many *facepalms*
Nevertheless UMMMMMM . BYE

Wednesday, 11 January 2012

Tuesday, 10 January 2012

Lots of Love :D

Since the 21st day of June , 2011 not a day has gone by when i haven't logged into blogger and read atleast one post on someone else's blog. I don't think I'm very good at what I write but I know I improve a little with every post , but there are so many blogs out there which are just brilliant and I personally think all of them should be writers . They inspire me and when one of them follows me or leaves a comment on my blog I have big grin on my face :D
 So I'm going to give out some love , no its not an award its just some love ..I don't think I'm good enough to give out any awards 
Ps: This is going to be one long post 
Pps : It's in no particular order.

1 . The View from 5'2"
    This is one of the first blogs that i followed . Nitisha is one smart cookie . The love of words and impeccable English makes her blog a delight and also a learning experience , because of her now I know that "happify" is a word. :P :D . If she is reading this now I'm very sure she's correcting my grammar mentally ( total grammar nazi ) *feels conscious* i love her blog cause short girls have opinions and they matter .

2. Coconut Chutney
  Anyone whose been on blogger for a while has read her blog . Her posts make me smile , laugh and actually make my day better in a little way . The fact that she also is a CA in the making and her stories about the experience of getting there are so easy to relate with. Her number of followers will tell you how awesome she is :D Chennai ki Chutney with a beautiful name , Lavanya

3.Chaai, Paani , Etc
  I love this blog simply because each time I read it , it feels like I have written it . I don't know how it happens each time , but its simply my life put into better words than I could ever have. Reading your blog makes me happy Isha :D

4. Autobiography of an ordinary man
This is one intelligent blog. Someone's whose posts I hope to find every time I log in . Narendra and Sheela Shenoy are an awesome couple and this is their jointly maintained blog. Their everyday anecdotes are hilarious . This is also one of the very old blogs I'm following for sometime now.

5. Little Moments of Bliss
This blog is beautiful . You feel all calmed down when you read her blog . Serendipity is a typical Virgo with a zeal for life and a fabulous hold on words. Your blog makes me smile =)

6. Red Handed
 Another crazy Virgo. Her blog is hilarious and crazy. She recommends you not to read her blog but trust me you have to . Her opinions are strong and she is one naughty girl that hates santa :P Plus all the red on the blog - I love :D

7.Sensitive Chaos
   This is one beautiful blog :D and also a beautiful blogger :). She makes you laugh , cry and giggle with her posts and also gives out lots of pyaar at the end of each post :D Blogger from Bangalore, Kanika blogs about life :D.

 I love this blog because her photos are awesomeness :D and so is her content . Her header makes me so jealous :o and  her posts make me happy :D and the love of books , big bang theory and pictures pictures and more pictures makes us so similar =) Go read her noww !!

9. Chattering of a Drunk Butterfly
    This is one crazy lady :P One of my first followers all the way from Karachi :o Ezazi I love your blog name and all the color on it :D Its a happy blog :D Go see her blog is soo cool :D

10. My thoughts, My blog
     I like his blog because its hilarious . A scientist in the making xyzandme , thank you for the insight into a virgin male's mind :P He is someone whose posts make you go What the 'fhaak' :P He has a chart ,diagram or some sort of representation for all his wierd hypothesis' :P You have to see his blog to understand what I'm saying :\ :P

11.18 Downing Street
   He needs to be here because he's just too cute :D and he loves quotes like I do :D He also writes awesome poetry once in a while :D Ovais i heart your blog :D

12. Teenage Mutiny
      Hamza is just the cutest :D 17 year old blogger from Karachi . He writes long posts which I love and he also runs a mutant army :P A die hard harry potter fanatic * same pinch* . Again,  one of the first few blogs i followed . Hamza you are awesome :D 

13. Woman and a quarter
    I love Judy . A single mom and fabulous blogger. She is also a published writer now :D I reviewed her book here. Her dreamy posts about "The One" make you go awww =) She inspires me to put it simply and she's also very beautiful :D Go stalk her NOW !

Okay I'm done . Yes at 13 , because I don't think 13 is an unlucky number =)

Lots of love from me to you >:D<

Also I have mentioned only a few of the blogs I read , there are many more talented people out there just that I got lazy . My apologies , some other time :)

Wednesday, 4 January 2012

Ode to Happiness (:

Yesterday my college had this big board which they set up and everyone was asked to write something that makes them happy and stick it there :D Just the concept made me smile so much . We are all chasing happiness aren't we . Everyone wants to be happy . The minute you start questioning your happiness you cease to be so.
     Happiness is the little things =) I made a list of the little things that make me happy here once. The most amazing part was that most people wrote the names of people on their chits. Like these people make me happy. Whatever happened to happiness is internally driven. Why should someone else be a reason for your happiness. People make me happy too , sure but if i had to put down one small thing I wouldn't name a person.

See it looks sooo nice :D >_< 

I love you ,  but I love myself more <3

This line by Samantha ( Sex and the city - google it man , which planet do you live on :P ) always made me smile and think , hell yeah why not . Why should anyone be more important than me in my life ? A funda we ignore most times in our lives. The minute you start putting yourself and your needs over someone else's you are termed selfish . Why? 
       Why should i not be selfish? Its my life and unfortunately or fortunately I have just one . But right in the middle of an ordinary life a love story takes you by storm , bringing with it that one person for whom you want to be selfless ..that one person who will come to mean more to you than yourself. Then you are taken over by the feeling of love , of joy , of just eternal happiness that you feel around this person . Love is one special feeling yes, but watch out who it is you're giving this position in your life to. Is this person a keeper or is it just a mask, waiting to fall apart . Don't assume that what happens to other people won't happen to you. Don't be in the illusion and say " Its US " cause when its over " We" becomes "I" and "Us" becomes " You and me " .
    On a personal note I'm exhausted of being a giver in every relationship I encounter..even a purely platonic friendship I'm just the eternal giver..and then I have to hear don't expect..I don't ..I try not to . I'm a giving person by choice and I like to put a smile on your face so I take the effort. But now i'm sick of it and no its nobody's fault. And as selfish as this is going to sound i'm done being the giver ..I want to be the taker now . I want someone to be on their toes for me . I want someone to take the effort of making me happy for once. I want to put my feet up and say this is what I want and have it produced in front of me just because someone wants to make me smile.
  Selfish ? Screaming for attention ? Yes. Guilty ? Not one bit . I'm living my life my way now . I'm living it a little more now ..each day ..everyday. I'm not even close to perfect and this whole note seems totally condescending but this is what i feel. So to the new me whose a little self centred and selfish than before . To the grey tones . Cheers =) 
This is mine :D Watching the sun set and sitting on the beach lazily makes me happy :D This is the first thing that came to my mind so there :D

Wasn't this an ode to happiness how did the conversation turn around to THAT ^ :P Some mind chow that was :P

Ps : Anyone who was expecting a real poem "ode" :P I can rhyme cat with mat and thats about it . Its a paragraphical ode O_o if there is such a thing :\ bye now :|

Monday, 2 January 2012

Some Story - Part 2

For those who dont know this is a continuation of something i wrote earlier here

Baby i'd love you to want me 
The way that i want you , the way that it should be
Baby , you'd love me to want you
The way that i want to if you'd only let it be   

 " Arush beta this is the 100th time your playing this song can you put it off now ? " Should i make you pakodas? " rambled his mom. 
" No thanks maa . "
" You haven't eaten well since days what's wrong with you ? " 
" Nothing maaaa . Stop asking the answer won't change everytime you ask . "
"Fine." . His mom had now stormed out of the room and the song filled the room again , their song.

Now it took time for me to know 
What you tried so not to show 
Something in my soul just cried 
       I see the warmth in your blue eyes  

Arush had been avoiding his friends for days now . Since the night on the terrace he drank alone every night in his building . His parents had started to worry. They had started asking questions like what now? College was over it was time for him to look for a job or decide about further studies and whatever he wanted to do with life and they wanted the answers NOW. 
He didn't know what he wanted . He wanted her. He tried hard each day to forget her ,  he told himself everyday  " She's getting married now , she broke up with you over TEXT , she didn't love you enough , she called you just to make you feel miserable , she hates you .. I LOVE HER " and that's how each drinking session began. 

Sometime last year 

Arush and Poo were trying to study. Poo was resting her head on his knee and reading Guide to Licensing and Agreements like it was a fashion magazine. She had always enjoyed studying law . It was her thing she said , she was a star at arguing and making a point . Poo suddenly turned to Arush and said " Arush what if we break up what will you do then ? " " Find another girlfriend i guess " he teased . Poo punched him with mock anger. 
" No seriously tell me , no ? What will you do ?"
" I'll stand outside your window everyday till you come back to me. "
" Well that would just be stalkish " she said and smiled her beautiful smile. Arush knew she was pleased. Girls ! He thought to himself , they always need some kind of assurance all the time that they are loved. A constant need to ask questions and mind you the answers have to be what they want to hear or else it will lead to a " So you mean if ... " hypothetically stupid argument. 


He missed her even more so now that she was going to be someone else's forever. He wanted to meet her one last time and tell her he loved her even if rejection would be all he would get. He had heard all about selfless love and all that maybe now it was time to feel it himself.

Arush picked up the phone and dialed her number with a teenager like enthusiasm . Just the thought that he would get to see her again made him extremely happy. He was smiling again.
The phone rang for a good 30 seconds after which it was finally answered by a girl with a young voice she yelled into the phone for some reason " Didi nahne gai hai baadmain phone karo " *click*
Arush assumed it was just her way of avoiding him again he was just about to start playing " I'd love you to want me " when the phone rang. It was her. "Hello ? " 
" Hey Arush , you called sorry that was my maid "
" Oh yeah right , the maid . " He smiled to himself at the memory of when the same maid had caught them kissing in her house once . She had to be cajoled and convinced not to tell anyone .
"So tell me ? "
She seemed so normal he thought like it wasn't affecting her . " Well aren't we friends Poo ? "
" Umm ofcourse we are , why ? " 
" Well then I'd like to meet you and congratulate you for the engagement and all " 
"Sure" poo chimed .
" Really ? " 
"Yeah , why not . Tomorrow Jogger's Park , 6 pm sharp. Don't be late " 
"Ok" he said .

to be continued....