Such a noob !

Firstly let me tell you i love Decembers i just do but this year totally sucked and this month is no exception !!
BIG BANG THEORY is also on a winter break whatever that means ..could it get worse ? 
Yeah a lot worse but that's not what i want to discuss today ..let's talk about happy things *looks around for inspiration* ...Nothing :(
   This seems like such a pointless post :S but its my blog ..no one reads it anyway ...so moving on the internship / job / donkey work that is my articles is turning out to be really dull and boring ..so not my thing..don't ask what my thing is i really don't know yet ..i can tell you what its not :

• auditing accounts , scrutinizing ledgers asking intelligent questions
• raising queries 
• filing e-returns , using a digital signature and feeling all smart
• visiting the babu at the income tax office and making him happy
• planning someone's tax
• raising eyebrows at people's lack of organisation and accounting knowledge ..BLAH RIGHT ? RIGHT ?

who could ever enjoy this ? When i picture things i just skip to the happy parts ..the fun parts which leads to big time WHAT THE FHAKS later :P

 I don't feel like getting up each day and going to work , i don't feel like doing this shit ..but i'm stuck here cause a simple BCOM degree without CA is not even going to fetch me peanuts..but i don't want the money . I'd need it but I don't want it ..I'd rather be a pony trainer :P

And you know what I'm missing a few people in my life right now ..missing as in not missing in the remembrance sort of way ..missing in the i don't really have anyone sort of way..but this to shall pass right (: 

  I feel lonely so i cry sometimes ..I need some sort of secure feeling ..its just missing . 

  I don't really know how to distract myself also ..cause ze job kinda sucks so i put my phone off for hours so that i don't call or text someone who doesn't want to hear from me . I want a grizzly bear hug.

Okay this is getting really sad ..but i just have one small question why aren't all the people i would die for and i was always there for not here for me ? *genuine doubt*

  Something inside me breaks a little everyday but its going to be okay ...because when all the bad things are done with only good things can happen (: 

   I'm going to laugh and love and smile again . Pinky promise to self :D 

PS : Grammar nazi's please fuck off ..i just needed to say these things to myself  >_<

I love you as much as i love pizza and that's ALOT ..so please be back shooooon :D 

My blogposts are deteriorating in size , frequency and matter ..my apologies ..i promise to be back shooon too ( again a promise to myself ..don't read this :X)